Euphemia Servilianus

Euphemia loves the sound of her own voice. How fitting it is that she would become a priestess of the Temple of the New, a clerical startup in need of research marketing. Religion is on the decline and where there is a trend downward it’s always a sign that the current providers have lost touch with the needs of the people. Euphemia hit the marketplace to find out why. The major complaint of those leaving faith behind is the amount of work involved with piety. It’s not just the good behaviour within oneself that’s exhausting, but the need to extend that effort to everyone else. Compassion, empathy, generosity —the list is endless. Who has the patience— which is another tiring virtue—to give that much to others with no expectation of receiving any of it back—another ridiculous requirement of the old scriptures. So, as a member of the Temple of the New, you need only provide a monthly tithe and your personal assurance that you’re trying your best. If you’re a happy person inside and not intentionally harming anyone else, you’re golden. Profits are up a little this month; just think of all those shiny souls!